Your owner's birthday or any other special occassion is the perfect time to sharpen your claws.
Just find that new jacket or outfit that your owner received as a present, and scratch away!
submitted by Sharon (as told to by her cat Pookie)
I always knew that Boo thought he was a dog
Boo has always been a little odd. He follows me around, tries to get in the
tub with me, and refuses to eat fish. But last week takes the cake. Boo is a one
food cat. If I try to change foods on him, he won't eat. The only foods he will accept
little bits of are cooked chicken or pork, yogurt or tuna juice (not the meat - just the juice) and
he will only take a tiny piece and then he'll walk away.
Last week my husband bought a big bag of dog food for his bulldogs and left it sitting in the living
room. I saw Boo scratching at it, but thought that it was just the shiny paper, or the thrill of getting
into something he wasn't supposed to. You know how it goes; doors, cupboards, shower, if it's
closed he wants in. The next day, I heard a crunching sound coming from the corner, looked over
to see what it was, and got the suprise of my life! There was Boo, munching away at these huge,
nuggets of dry dog food! I'm still not sure what he was thinking. I guess he thought that it
was time to assert his dog-hood.
submitted by Alice
RULES FOR CATS WHO HAVE A HOUSE TO RUN
1. Chairs and Rugs:
If you have to throw up, get into a chair quickly. If you cannot manage in time, get to an
Oriental rug. If there's no Oriental rug, shag would be sufficient. When throwing up on a
carpet, be sure you back up while doing so, to make sure the mess you leave is as long
as a human foot.
2. Doors:
Do not allow closed doors at any time in your house. To get a door open, stand on hind
legs, and hammer with forepaws. Once door is opened, it is not necessary to use it.
After you have ordered an outside door opened, stand halfway in and out and think
about several things. This is particularly important during very cold weather, rain, snow
and mosquito season.
3. Bathrooms:
Always accompany humans to the bathroom. Make sure they let you in (see above rule
regarding doors) and then simply sit there and stare at them.
4. Guests:
Quickly determine which guest hates cats. Sit on that human's lap. If you can arrange it,
have the latest brand of processed canned food (preferably fish) on your breath.
When sitting on a guest's lap or rubbing against their pants, select the color of clothing
most opposite from your fur. For example, if you are white, make sure to choose the
guest in the black trousers and vice-versa
When guests are over for dinner, be sure to jump right on the table and drag your tail
through every dish. When scolded, be sure to look surprised, so as to show the guests
that you are normally allowed up therre.
4. Hampering:
If one of your humans is busy and the other is being lazy, stick with the busy one. This
is called helping but otherwise known as hampering. Here are three activities it is fun to
help the humans with
1) When human is cooking and you are supervising, just sit behind the left heel of the
cook. You can't be seen there, so you have a good chance of being stepped on and
therefore picked up and consoled.
2) When human is reading a good book, get in really close under the chin, standing on
the human's chest. If you can get between the human's eye and the book, you have
successfully hampered this activity. If the human is sitting at a table reading, just lay
your whole body across the reading material.
3) When a human is knitting, curl up quietly and pretend you are sleeping. Occasionaly
reach out and whip oyur claws across the knitting needles. This can cause the human to
get mad and throw you a ball of yarn to play with. But always remember, the aim is to
hamper the human activity, so just ignore the ball of yarn, and continue with whacking
the needles. (NOTE: this works well with pens to when the human is trying to write)
6. Play:
This is really important, get plenty of sleep during the day so you are fresh for playing
kitty games in the middle of the night. The best place to do this is in the human's
bedroom, and preferably right on the bed.
7. Bedtime:
Always sleep right on top of the human when you decide to get some sleep. If they try
to move, make it clear this is not allowed.
In conclusion, make sure you teach your human the rules. They can be taught if you
start early and remain totally consistent. Once they are taught successfully, you will
then have a smooth running household.
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